To you

I wanted to be happy for you.
I do, I really do but...

My heart, mind and entire being is just full of hatred, jealousy, envy, sorrow, and bottled up emotions.
I just cant be 100% supportive towards you.
I want too but somewhere in myself, I hate you.

I hate everything about you.
I hate how you have everything that I can't have.
I hate how you can live your life unlike mine.

I know I'm not the best kind of human being like this but..

Cycle

The cycle of life...
You know~
It goes like this :-

Life > Adolescence > Adulthood > Plateau > Death

Its a beautiful cycle of all living being.
Some might think differently but for me, that is the cycle.

Now, I have my own cycles.
I have a cycle of self-hate and craving.
I got more than 2 but there are all random cycles.

Crying

All over the years that I had live,
I am a cry baby...
I love to cry...
I mean its like each week I would cry a few time.

Its not mainly because I'm sad,
The cause would always be me.
I taunt and bully myself to the point of crying.
This cycle happen each day.
I would try to not cry.